LOVE PSYCHOLOGIST: "it won't happen again"...uh-huh. so she says!

But women can apologise oh. Whether she bashed your car, had a fling when you were away, or ate your food, all she has to do is look into your eyes, lean in close, rub your head, and the magic begins. Then, before you know it, somehow she is much closer, too close sef. Body don begin melt.

That’s when she goes in for the kill: soft, slow kisses on your neck, your forehead, your ear, (Jesus!) your cheek.... All the time she is messing with your mind, she is saying, “baby, I’m sorry.” Before you know it, you are the one saying, “baby, I’m sorry.”

NO!!!! NO!!!NO!!!!!  I reject this for you in Jesus name! This is not how it was supposed to end. Push her on the couch, or on the road sef, and run for ya life. Bros, women understand how to use seduction to get away with murder. What the hell are you telling her sorry for? 9 times out of 10 you are wrong, but this time she was definitely the bad guy.

This ain’t the time for junior to start poking out his one-eyed self. Take a deep breath and stand strong. Look at the wall if you have to-anywhere but her puppy eyes. Ask yourself if you did anything to provoke her bad behavior. If you are 100% positive (not 80%, not 99%) you didn’t cause any of her actions, darling, you need to make her understand she upset you. But please no yelling or screaming- only children and women do that. And no retaliation to hurt her. They say two wrongs don’t make it right…

HEALTH: Shaving Mr. Man

No, we're not talking about your  head or your body. That brainless guy between your legs (Mr. Man) should be maintained and not just for sexual reasons.

Mr. Man is tucked all day, every day under your boxers or briefs, beneath your trousers. Think of all the sweat and heat packing in there. Now add a forest of hair and imagine the bacteria breeding there...

Some studies encourage complete hairlessness of the male genitals, while others recommend trimming as total hair removal may increase transmission of STDs and cause other skin issues like warts, skin irritations and bacterial skin infections.

It's your choice to be hairy, completely hairless or trimmed down there but, BE AWARE!

HEALTH: Habits and our spiritual health.

Pastor Chris Oyakhilome would have you believe masturbation is not a sin. And many men would tend to agree with him. Heck, playing with the family jewels is soothing and increases endorphins (hormones that make us happy). Shouldn’t that be a good thing?

I personally think that masturbation, while it may be pleasurable, is a sin. But what about drinking and smoking? Are they sins? Am I a hypocrite because I think masturbation is a sin, but I think it’s ok to drink some alcohol and smoke a bit as long as both are done in moderation? After all didn’t Jesus in one of his letters say that it’s not what goes into a man that defiles him but what comes out?  Who decides what limit moderation falls in? What might be extreme for one person, might be “moderate” for another person.

It’s a tough call, but a friend of mine would say “let he who has no sin cast the first stone”. Hmmmmm. Do we just try to convince ourselves that certain habits are not that bad to the detriment of our spiritual health? This is not a judgemental article. I have my own sins.  But it is certainly food for thought – we exercise, eat right, manage stress, but our we paying attention to our spiritual health?

LOVE PSYCHOLOGIST: Very Good Bad Gyal - Lady in the streets and a freak in the bed!

How many of you would like a wife that RE-PRE-SENTS when you guys go out? She looks tan-fastic,  is polite and meek and smiles like an angel? However, when you both are home alone, and kids are in school, you just can’t get enough of her because she is so feisty. She will kiss you in all the right places and hold you very close.

Everybody’s hands go up abi? If you ask me, those little things bring some excitement to the marriage. Your wife is not too predictable, and you know you can always count on her to bring some spice into the marriage. Umm.. ok… rewind… Did I just say marriage?

What about an ordinary relationship?  Doesn’t it apply? Well, this article is for men who have been brave enough to jump the broom. If you are in a relationship and reading this, I cannot say “STOP!” But I will say you are so on your own whatever you do. If you like, be looking for freaky leaky; when mistake pregnancy comes, don’t cry oh. Hehe.

Anywaysssss, to my brothers who have been man enough to put a ring on it, sometimes you might be lucky and your lady naturally has those talents, but sometimes you might marry a lady and she is very reserved about certain areas. Believe it or not, some ladies have no clue on how to be intimate with their husbands. Not their fault; please do not blame them or get frustrated; just be patient, communicate, and encourage your spouse over time. Before you know it, you’ll be singing “Baby, you’re a firework!” *wink*

STYLE: MUST-HAVE ACCESSORIES FOR THE MODERN MAN

Are you the total man? Check that you have all of these: 

1)      Technologically savvy smartphone

 

2)      Handsfree Bluetooth headsets

 

3)      Sunglasses

SOCCER CHAT: Bundesliga Final for UCL?

No words can describe the shocking first legs for the UEFA Champions League semi-finals with Dortmund and  Bayern Munich almost annihilating the Spanish sides. Everyone expected  two tough matches; nobody expected a walk over for Germany. Is there a mentality or a style of training in Bundesliga this season that makes them indestructible?

Second leg comes up with Dortmund playing Real Madrid at Bernabeu on Tuesday, and Bayern meeting Barcelona at Camp Nou on Wednesday. It is definitely going to be a thrilling two days and I will be watching both matches. El Clasico final is looking very unlikely. YYYAAAYYY.

Manchester United was given a guard of honour at Emirates Stadium, where RVP scored a penalty to deny Arsenal a much needed win. Arsenal does not deserve to be in top four after years of being trophiless. Spurs and Chelsea have a game in hand, so we can only hope they both win their next three games so that Arsenal  is booted out of the top four in EPL.

HEALTH: side effects of weed

I was gonna go to work but I was high...

Your friends have probably told you, that the only thing weed will do to you is relax you when you’re stressed. W-R-O-N-G!!! Marijuana has several side effects that could be seriously detrimental to your health:

REDUCED TESTICLES/ INFERTILITY, forgetfulness,  HEADACHE, vomiting, IMPAIRED MENTAL FUNCTIONING, dry or red eyes, HEART/ BLOOD PRESSURE PROBLEMS, lung problems, dizziness, HALLUCINATONS, numbness, PANIC REACTIONS, flashbacks, DIFFICULTY CONCENTRATING, depression, ANXIETY…

And the list goes on…

So next time you want get “high”, have a re-think

RELATIONSHIPS: I bust the window out your car...

I had a dream yesterday. In my dream, some trifling nigga (excuse my French *ahem*) was playing mind games with me and another chick. This dude was not even that good looking – thank God it was just a dream- and he come dey act like im own the world.

When I found out what this insignificado was up to, I planned for him. I didn’t scream or shout. I just walked out of his life. Lie, Lie! Just like that? Mba oh! I bought a sharp knife

STYLE: 2013...Skinny Jeans in or out?

Do grown men still wear skinny jeans? I think Jay-Z says it best:

"Can't wear skinny jeans 'cause my knots don't fit"
nuff said...

RELATIONSHIPS: Her weight doesn't matter...OR DOES IT?

How many of you men fell in love with a beautiful woman, sexy in every way? You got past infatuation, fights and disagreements and walked down the aisle. One baby, two babies, three, and one day you look at your wife and suddenly she is MASSIVE!! How did she put on all this weight? Between taking care of you and the children, and managing the house and her career, she just stopped paying attention to her figure.

So does it change the love you felt for her? After all, you did say “for better, for worse…” Watch the video below and share with your girlfriend or wife if she has a sense of humour

MESSI: 300 and 301 for Barca

MESSII!! Little man wonder! That free kick… I don’t want to watch him against AC Milan during Champions League this week. Come to think of it, I don’t want to see Bayern Munich play Arsenal either. Arsenal is out of FA cup, Premiershi title, Capital One... Let's keep our fingers crossed for them cos

Be a BOSS with Hugo Boss

Why are Hugo Boss suits so expensive? No, it’s not just the brand name. The tailoring of Hugo Boss suits is in a class of its own, and stands out anywhere. Hugo Boss suits are also made with wool, which doesn’t make the suits hot, as many people would assume. In fact, the higher the percentage of wool, the lighter the suit, and the less the suit will crease when it is folded or rumpled.

Suits start at 137,000 naira and are worth the buy for those special occasions. Look sharp; go get yourself a suit by Hugo Boss at the Hugo Boss Store, The Palms Shopping Centre, Lekki, Lagos.

HEALTH: Top foods for men

1)                  Walnuts: Eating walnuts regularly helps heart health and also helps maintain sexual vitality in men. Many nuts like cashews are great for the body.
2)                  Bananas: Eating a banana on a regular basis will work to keep potassium levels strong to lower high blood pressure, and also provide the body with energy.
3)                  Spinach & Broccoli: Lutein in broccoli and spinach will help lower risk of heart attack and stroke by hindering cholesterol deposits of artery walls in men
4)                  Beans: good source of fiber and are high in iron, a mineral that helps oxygen circulate the body, keeps muscles healthy and boosts function of the immune system.
5)                  Eggs: high in iron, which can help prevent hair loss, and also in sulfur which helps keep your hair soft and smooth.

*Drink lots of WATER! WATER! WATER!

KISS ME QUICK

Lots of kissing going on this Valentine season huh? And the word around town is that kissing is healthier than shaking hands because your hands have been everywhere. Sha, before you go cuddling and smooching, you should know you use a total of 34 facial and 112 postural muscles during a French kiss.

And, over a million bacteria are transferred during kissing. Most are good bacteria, but still…Wow! Kissing sounds like too much stress. Please be guided this Valentine season…

HEALTH: Penis Enlargement is it safe

Women do anything and everything to be physically beautiful – liposuction, breast and butt implants, facial surgery, even rib removal. Why shouldn’t men’s insecurities be addressed? Women whine and cry everyday about fixing their physical imperfections; why shouldn’t we empathize with men?  .

For those of you that have considered getting an increase in size for reasons best known to you, I am on my knees begging you not to. Forget what you may have read in a magazine or googled on the internet – there is no known foolproof way to increase size.

Yeah, there are several things you can do to increase

SOCCER CHAT: Manchester United for treble???

May Man City continue to lose!!!!!! After losing to Southhampton on Saturday, the Premiership title is slipping from Man City’s grip. YYYYaaaaaaayyyy. Carmen can verify any day, anytime that the Red Devils are the BEST in England and deserve to win EPL, UCL and FA Cup *cheesy grin*. It’s still a looong way to the end of the season, so we won’t count our chickens before they hatch, but things are looking good, especially after yesterday’s win against Everton. Ohh, Giggs is so hot! I know my boys will give Real Madrid a good fight this Wednesday during the Champions League match at the Bernabeu. Mourinho was spying on the lads again, but nothing for Real on Wednesday.

Shameless supporter I know.

I DON'T BELIEVE IN VALENTINE'S DAY

Truly, truly, do some men really not believe in Valentine’s day? Last year, a guy told me he wasn’t celebrating Valentine’s day with his chick because he did not believe that one day should be set aside to show somebody that you love them.

Ok, I’m not sure I buy that one oh. Are you just being cheap or are you out with another girl on that day? Sha, if I was a guy I wouldn’t look forward to Valentine’s day because

INVESTING RIGHT: BASICS

It’s never too early to begin to invest in stock or property. As soon as you leave university you should start putting a little money aside for investments. You can even ask your parents or family to buy shares in your name. Investment pays off in the long run. But, WAIT!!! There are few essentials to consider before buying shares:

WOWWWW!!! SUPER CHICKENS NO MORE

Fantastic!!! The Super Eagles have improved dramatically since the group stages at the beginning of the nations cup. My eyes are seriously deceiving me.

Ghana is playing Burkina Fasso in a bit, and I dare say we will be playing Ghana on Sunday 10 March 2013 @ 1900 hrs naija time.

Who do you think will win? I think we will win on penalties.

Fingers crossed.

STYLE:What is she getting YOU for Valentine's day?

Yeeeesss. V-day is coming very soon and I’m sure you’re babe is dropping hints of what she would like. Errr, have you thought about what you’d like? Perfumes always make a good present for a guy, especially the ones that make you smell like the B-O-S-S you are. To make things easier for you, FMBC has listed a few manly scents that you could suggest to your lady *wink*

Now, before she goes rushing off to buy you Tony Montana,

SOCCER CHAT: SUPER CHICKENS CAN FLY

Go Eagles, Go Eagles. On to semi-finals to play Mali. I must admit, although I was rooting for the Super Eagles, I was not too confident we would win Ivory Coast with superstars like Drogba, Toure, Tiote and Eboue, and  after the awoof win against Ethiopia a few days ago.  

Haha. *doing a little victory dance*. Shame on all you Nigerians that

Low testosterone levels and your health, mood and sex drive

Lethargy. No energy. No motivation. Have you felt that lately? And you just put it down to work and stress? My brother, you could be wrong. These are classic symptoms of low testosterone levels in your body. Testosterone is that hormone that makes you the sexy men we love – beard/mustache, deep voice...

Many men pay little attention to subtle changes in their health and could ignore these signs for a while. Even if you work out and are muscular, you can still get low levels of testosterone. Fatigue, mood swings and decreased sex drive are also symptoms

2013- Should I try to work it out or just move on to another girl who seems nice?

Please!!! Everywhere I go, I see reminders that it’s a new year and it’s time to get rid of old habits (or girls). TV commercials, magazines and especially the radio cannot just stop talking about relationships!!!!

I hear men talking about breaking ties with one girl and elevating the status of another girl, who’s been patiently on the side. Guess what? The grass is always going to be greener on the other side.

WELCOME TO FOR MEN BY CARMEN

“The Corner was our time when time stood still…” – Common

Men drive me NUTS!!!!. I have killed myself for many years trying to understand how the male mind works. Guys are weird, inconsistent, aggravating and can never make up their minds. Aarrgghhh. True talk- men are from Mars and Women are from Venus.