Sweetheart, I’ve been down that road too. Met an older,
gorgeous, intellectually stimulating man and we completely hit it off. Same
sarcastic sense of humor, superiority complex…we’re still really good friends
two years down the line, but…he’s divorced. So I never let anything happen.
Is it because the bible and (Nigerian) society tell us that
being romantically involved with a married man is an abomination? If there was
no God eh…Lol. Let me not expose masef.
But, besides religious implications, some of us females
subconsciously don’t want to be intimate with somebody who couldn’t keep his
marriage together. Let’s face reality – that is not the most attractive trait
in a guy. Or you didn’t know before you married that she would change? Guess
what you changed too. She cheated?
My brother, either you took her for granted
and caused her to cheat, or your wifey was promiscuous before you married and
you knew but, lust and pressure to marry blinded you.
Marriage is sacrifice and our (Nigerian) parents had many
challenges but they stuck through bad and good times, through many years for
YOUR sake. Give your parents a hug tonight. It’s not easy but it says a lot for
a man (and even a woman) to be able to keep a family together.
So, when she wards off your sexual advances or toasting,
please understand that subconsciously she is wondering if you will be able to
make this work between you and her.
All hope isn’t lost. I’m sure in this new generation, girls
don’t mind as much so keep searching cos love isn’t a sprint; it’s a marathon.
Keep smiling. HugsJ
Pic credit: www.essence.com
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