LOVE PSYCHOLOGIST: I GOT YOUR BOYFRIEND MAD COS I'M A FLIRT!!

"...and them haturs, they gon hate," R. KELLY bbaaabbbbbbbbyyyyy!!!!!

Well, well well. You gotta be who you are right? 

Abeg, sometimes I encourage guys to flirt with a chick so that her boyfriend doesn't take her for granted. If she checking for a platinum kinda guy and her boyfriend is just gold...well *clears throat* the grass is sometimes greener on the other side:)

Everyone, yes even your saintly holy holy girlfriend, likes a lil bit of attention sometimes from another guy, nothing serious. If she does go off with the guy, don't be mad at the dude. You should know how strong (or fickle) your chick is before introducing her to your playa friends or taking her to the club. And if she is that kinda chick, nigga you don't wanna be with her.

Don't hate the player homie, change YOUR game:)

HEALTH: THE DRAGON MUST BE FED

Most men generally can gear up any day any time, while women have to be in the mood, be without mental stress, not be on her monthly period, blah, blah, BLAH!

This is only because men have a higher sex drive than women, and it has biological reasons. The area in the male brain that controls seuxal desire is larger and more easily activated than that of the female brain. Go figure. But society tells us that something is wrong is with men when they manifest their sexual urges.

“Men are designed by evolution to be attracted to sexual novelty and to gradually lose sexual attraction to the same partner in the absence of such novelty”

Of course, any man can control his carnal feelings if he really wants to, if he respects you and values your relationship, but ladies, be a little patient, if he stares at other girls or flirts or acts silly. Know his cycle and know if you can keep up, and be up for changing things up a bit once in a while. They (men) all have ADHD! :)

LOVE PSYCHOLOGIST: SHE WON'T SPLIT RENT. INDEPENDENT WOMAN MY...

Exactly!!! Naija women be talking feminism and 21st century ish, women's rights and celebrating international women's day, but when its time to put down money, they remember that a man's place is to be the provider. Women...scammers

We all love a chivalrous man, who's got his lady's back, but let's be realistic for a second. In our grandparents time, and perhaps early in our parents time, the societal idea was that the man (in a marital home) was the sole (only, single, riding solo) breadwinner. The man was expected to provide the bulk of income coming into the family and anything his wife earned was seen as supplementary, nothing substantial. Her primary job was to be a home-maker and take care of the kids.

Until maybe three decades ago, the woman's role in the work force was very limited (at least in Naija). The ratio of men to women in any office was probably 10:1. Men got promotions much faster than women and even when women were promoted, the increase in pay was not as much as what the men got. No be the women's rights we dey fight for? Now, we got those rights, but we no wan the responsibility

HEALTH: PEYRONIE'S DISEASE (CURVATURE OF THE PENIS)

Say what? Seriously? The things you find on the internet. *hand over eyes*. And we thought only women had issues. Truth be told though, men - and the women in their lives - need to be aware.

What is the curvature nonsense? Basically, when the penis is erect it takes a significantly curved shape and causes sexual intercourse to be difficult and occasionally painful.

Although the cause is unclear, a likely cause of Peyronie's disease (PD), which is more common in men over 40 years, is due to injury to the penis (hitting or bending) that causes bleeding in the penis. PD could also result from inherited genes or side effects of certain medication.

(Some) good news though: PD can resolve on its own 5%-19% of the time. Surgery and medication are also options if the situation doesn't disappear. But of course, there is no guarantee of normal penal function after treatment.

So please, treat junior with care, and seek medical attention if you notice any unusual shapes.

LOVE PSYCHOLOGIST: WE SUPPORT DIFFERENT POLITICAL PARTIES: ITS OVER

Haha! Hilarious! LMAO. Sorry, sorry oh. I thought we were in the 21^st century – full of modern and forward thinking progressives. So what if your chick supports a different political party? Oh, so you’re one of those guys that believe every single thing should be in sync between two of you – support the same club, wear matching outfits, love the same soup? Yeah, it may seem cute occasionally, but that is quite boring in the long run.

Your girlfriend doesn't have to do everything the way you do to prove she loves you or that she’s at one with you. And wouldn't you rather she have her own identity? I vote variety as the spice of life jare. With these past elections, full of drama and panic as usual, I can imagine tensions running high if you’re on opposite sides, but

HEALTH: DEALING WITH ADULT ADHD

Experiencing any of these problems recently?

·         Chronic lateness and forgetfulness.

·         Anxiety.

·         Low self-esteem.

·         Employment problems.

·         Difficulty controlling anger.

·         Impulsiveness.

·         Substance abuse or addiction.

·         Poor organization skills.

·         Procrastination.

·         Low frustration tolerance.

·         Chronic boredom.

·         Difficulty concentrating when reading.

·         Mood swings.

·         Depression.

·         Relationship problems.

You might be exhibiting

LOVE PSYCHOLOGIST: WOMEN AND MARRIAGE! WHY CAN'T WE BE FRIENDS?

Well....marriage is not for everyone. Bros if marriage is not for you, please don't string a girl along for too long.
Being open from the onset saves everyone a lot of stress in the loooonnngg run.

video: Youtube - He's just not that into you

HEALTH: BLOOD IN SEMEN

Scary ish yeah? But it happens. Even got a medical term - hematospermia

Blood can appear in semen as a result of inflammation/ infection, after a medical procedure, because of STDS (chlamydia or gonorrhoea), too much sex (which may damage the sex organs), damaged blood vessels, liver disease and other medical conditions. Symptoms may include blood in the urine, painful urination or ejaculation, fever, other signs of STDs or swollen/ tender sex organs.

Sometimes, the blood is temporary and disappears after a bit, usually after a medical procedure like prostate gland biopsy. However, if you have repeated episodes of blood in your semen, there might be a serious problem. Either ways, please see your doctor so that the right tests can be carried out.  Such tests include urinalysis, rectal examination, STD testing and other urological tests, and relevant treatments can be given after the right cause of bleeding is properly detected. 

So, if you see red when you should see white/ cream/ pale yellow, PLEASE holler at ur doc.

BE AWARE!!

Pic credit: www.boundless.com

LOVE PSYCHOLOGIST: SO WHAT IF I'M DIVORCED?

Sweetheart, I’ve been down that road too. Met an older, gorgeous, intellectually stimulating man and we completely hit it off. Same sarcastic sense of humor, superiority complex…we’re still really good friends two years down the line, but…he’s divorced. So I never let anything happen.

Is it because the bible and (Nigerian) society tell us that being romantically involved with a married man is an abomination? If there was no God eh…Lol. Let me not expose masef.

But, besides religious implications, some of us females subconsciously don’t want to be intimate with somebody who couldn’t keep his marriage together. Let’s face reality – that is not the most attractive trait in a guy. Or you didn’t know before you married that she would change? Guess what you changed too. She cheated?

HEALTH: AVOIDING SHAVING BUMPS

Nah. Nobody likes to see a guy with bumps on his jaw from shaving with a stick. And this our curs-ed naija, nappy curly hair makes shaving a NIGHTMARE!

A few tips if you’ve got shaving issues:

i)                    Shave right after your shower when the hair is soft

ii)                   Use a good shaving cream and the right shaving stick - the more the blades, the easier the shave. Gillette Fusion Silvertouch Power is a good (although quite pricey) stick to use.

iii)                 If your skin is sensitive to sticks, use a clipper or an electric shaver

iv)                 Shave with the grain not against it

v)                  Exfoliate before you shave. Lather St. Ives apricot scrub on your face while you shower to soften the skin.

vi)                 Use good after-shave product

vii)               If none of these work, you just gonna have to stop shaving all the hair off your face and trim your beard and moustache regularly.

Sorry mate, beauty is pain!

LOVE PSYCHOLOGIST: WILL YOU MARRY ME?

When does a man decide he is ready to take the plunge? My brothers. I have cracked my head for almost a week on this one. I have seen men date a girl, call her everyday for three years, wine her and dine her, only to disappear and next thing the relationship is called off. So what’s the deal?

Firstly, plenty plenty choices dey and he doesn’t want to make the wrong choice. Why settle immediately for amala? What if the other dish is better? Pounded yam, afang soup, fried rice, fresh cat fish, chocolate cake, chicken and chips…God Almighty, lead this man not into temptation.  C’mon a man gotta sample all the dishes then choose the one that will gyrate his frequency.

A brother has to take his time cos this is for life and as a male friend once told me, it’s all about personal satisfaction –what makes him happy, what he can tolerate and bottomline, if he’s ready financially, mentally and emotionally to be tied to one woman for the rest of his life. My brothers am I right or am I right?

Women need to understand that “Will You Marry Me”, is the job offer after a serious selection process, and like any interview, the candidate with the most potential to succeed carries home the grand prize. Ladies, understand what pleases your man in the long run. My lovely men, please choose wisely!

Picture credit: www.ebay.com.au

HEALTH: BODY HAIR - SEXY OR REPULSIVE?

SO. NOT. SEXY.

Lol. Just kidding oh. Depends on where the hair’s at. Sometimes though, I can’t help wondering how a chick with a hairy boo, can get through all that hair to kiss his chest…I don’t mind hairy arms and legs though.

Seriously though…a little hair is good, but if you be like that biblical guy (Esau was the hairy one abi?) you might want to consider investing in a body trimmer. Yup!! Incredible. This world lacks nothing. Philips, Remington…you name it. Just googlebodytrimmers. Lol. And we say women are vain.

According to GQ’s “comprehensive grooming guide’’ you should trim your chest (when it is dry), going in the direction of the grain, then going all the way down. http://www.gq.com/style/grooming/201306/gq-mens-body-grooming-duide

Waxing is also an option if you like pain therapy.J

Keep it all on, shave it all off, at the end of the day, the amount of hair on your body is your decision and your lady’s.

PS, that monobrowish though…nah. Not cool.

Picture credit: dailymail.co.uk

LOVE PSYCHOLOGIST: SHE DOESN'T STOP NAGGING!!!!

 God forbid!! Just like your mother right? Or even worse! I can’t stand girls that nag either. Don’t mind her jare. Lol. 

Imagine! In today’s world where there are so many girls waiting in line to be your sugar banana? Sometimes you just wish you belonged to a generation where you could smack a woman for talking too much abi?

*hiss*. What can I say? I think, as women we’ve all been there. Your lady tells you to do or not to do something, or tells you what you did wrong and that is where the problem starts because you don’t respond the way she wants you to.

Panic mode…Feeling unappreciated…Irritation grows – and once her emotional floodgates are opened…Haha. I would not want to be in your shoes.

But I think we all know nagging has quite the opposite effect so abeg bros, before she gets into the mood, please just whatever it is you were supposed to do or just say sorry and plant a kiss on her forehead. Doesn’t cost you a minute and trust me you won’t be sleeping on the couch tonight.

If it makes you feel better, she only nags cos she cares…don’t worry you can never understand the strange ways a woman shows her love.

Picture credit:nydailynews.com

HEALTH: MALE REPRODUCTIVE CANCERS

Ovarian cancer…cervical cancer…uterine cancer. Geez! It never ends with women does it? Haba!

How about you guys? Guess what? It takes a sperm and an egg to make a baby so if your reproductive organs have issues, no baby’s coming. Anyone can get cancer in any part of their body; reproductive cancers occur when there is excessive cell growth in the reproductive (sex) organs.

Hmmm. Do I hear you say, this article is for older men? Better know that testicular cancer is more common between men of 15 and 34 years. Before my research, I assumed prostate cancer, was the only reproductive cancer. So READ!!

Common male reproductive cancers include:

Cancer type	Symptoms
Penile cancer	Redness, discomfort, sore or lump on penis
Testicular cancer	Pain, discomfort, lump or swelling in testicle
Prostate cancer	Weak flow of urine, blood in urine, pain in the back, hips or pelvis

Prostate cancer can be screened for

LOVE PSYCHOLOGIST: MY BABE HAD A TERRIBLE PAST! SHOULD I STILL MARRY HER?

“Omo, that girl na your babe? Make you cool down oh. Na she dey service all the guys for uni so she go push jeep.”

DAMN!! That is a hard one to wriggle out of, even if this all happened more than 12 years ago. Hmm. I don’t even know what to say about this one. Nobody wants to wife the girl who’s been around the block, but just occasionally, men have to deal with such hurt. Wahala oh!

Do you really want to marry this chick? If you are not serious about settling down with her, no harm done. However, if you envision her as your wife, you both need to discuss this one. Hmmmm. Not easy; not easy at all. Pele, my dear. I feel your pain. Your parents, your friends, your entire village clan…This is the kind of gist that you’ll never hear the end of once it gets out. Omo you have to consider the grave consequences of taking a step forward with your lady. Can you be sure that if, God forbid, times get tough with you she won’t resort to “tested and trusted” methods

HEALTH: HIS ERRATIC BEHAVIOUR

Okay, my lovely men, let’s be honest sometimes you get irritable for no reason. Just get into some kind mood swings like that. Abeg, abeg we all have issues in this world, no need to pour out your frustrations on us.

But…what if you can’t control it? The impulsiveness is frequent and the mood swings are about to get you fired. Ever been there? Don’t worry sweetheart, it’s only borderline personality disorder (BPD)

LOVE PSYCHOLOGIST: You can take the girl outta the gutta but brother you can't take the guttah out of the girl

My brothers. SHINE YOUR EYES!! SHINE YOUR EYES WELL, WELL! Hmmmmmm. The gorgeous hair, make up and fabulous bodies hide a LOOOOOOOT of flaws. Foine girl, dressed to kill, drawing attention as soon as she walks in the room but a sistah is brain dead and clueless about the world.

I’m talking about the kinda gurl that gbosas  in almost every sentence she makes or the one that always want to do “take-away” at every function she goes to.

 She will not hesitate to fight another chick or cuss out her man in public at the slightest provocation. And she will threaten you with her sugar daddy if you don’t give her what she wants. Yeeessss…that girl.  

Be careful amigos – tout ce qui brille n’est pas or (all that glitters apparently ain’t gold) 

picture credit: www.artflakes.com

HEALTH: when Jesus say yes, nobody can say no...

Indeed. Wait a minute oh. You and your chick check your blood genotype lately? This is more important than getting her father’s approval. I think in the last year, about three male friends have told me they dated a girl for about two years before discovering they were both AS. My Naija brothers are so darn smart but sometimes eh? They tire me so.

Okay back to basics: there are three major genotypes: AA, AS, and SS (new medical gist is saying there are also AC, CC, and CS genotypes, but that one is for another day). SS is the danger group. If you are AS and your chick is AS, there is a one in four chance of you having a child with SS. If that child has SS genotype (sickle cell anaemia), that child will be quite unhappy and uncomfortable growing up – if the child even lives to adulthood. The health risks involved are numerous.

Sickle cell anaemia occurs when red blood cells have a sickle-like shape (crescent) instead of the disc-like shape that normal red blood cells have. It is the result of a child inheriting two abnormal haemoglobin genes from both parents. Red blood cells contain haemoglobin, which transport oxygen around the body. When the red blood cells are shaped like crescents, blood flow is obstructed and many complications can occur, which usually result in frequent visits to the hospital.

http://www.nhlbi.nih.gov/health/health-topics/topics/sca

Soooo…before you go thinking you are a match made in heaven, please endeavor to check out your genotypes and discuss options if both of you are AS. As for SS and SS mating…I think my heart would just break if I heard that.

I know SS kids that have grown into wonderful men and women, thanks to God, determined parents and a little money in the bank.

Love is kind and love is good, but love is also considerate of the future…so please do the right thing before proclaiming love.

LOVE PSYCHOLOGIST: BABE BE GOING THROUGH MY PHONE...

From personal experience, that is a BIG NO-NO in any relationship. I did that once and the astronomical consequences…haha. Trust is fundamental in any relationship, and if she’s going through your phone she probably doesn’t trust you.

My brother, come first, maybe you should check yourself oh. Are you telling her unbelievable lies? Or are you always telling her about a discussion you had or a place you both went and she has no clue what you’re talking about? Obviously, it was with another damsel but memory lapse… Are you giving her reasons not to trust you? Hmmm.

There are always two sides to a story so maybe she is just a jealous psycho yah?

HEALTH: APHRODISIACS VS VIAGRA

“…When I get that feeling, I want that sexual healing…Get up, get up, get up, get up…” Mmmmm. Marvin Gaye can make a body hot, but that one-eyed nigga don fall your hand …5^th time in two weeks.

Erectile Dysfunction (ED) is basically the inability of a man to “get it up” regularly, and many people seek medical prescriptions to correct the *ahem* sticky situation. But err, before you go running to your doctor, do your research on Hugh Hefner’s Viagra stash and more natural alternatives.

Viagra has several side effects including dizziness, stomach discomfort, blurred vision, chest pain and even erection for up to four hours!!! (Nah you want motivation, lol). Yes oh. They’ll put all that one in tiny print at the end so you don’t bother reading but you should know what goes into your body.

Some people would suggest trying aphrodisiacs